The Land of the Free

This week Justino and I drove to the border to renew the permission given to us by the Mexican government to have our truck in this country. We went to Matamoros, right over the border from Brownsville Texas. We left Eva with a friend from church, and I was looking forward to some time without her, and a fun road trip with Justino. We were blessed with success on getting the permit and safety as we traveled, but the trip was a blaring reminder that we want to go home.
Three relatively small events robbed me of the peace that I had recently found about settling permanently here. Standing alone each of these events were small and could be argued insignificant, but all together coupled with the fatigue and expense of the journey ( keep in mind we are still unemployed) made me ache and wonder what God wants us to do, and make me wonder why we are still here.
The first was at the office of immigration, and the officer asked me for a customs slip that had been granted to my brother in law when he was given the first permit on the truck. I didn't have it and was worried because the officer said that I couldn't get the permit without turning in that slip. Well he then proceeded to tell me that if I would put " a little somthing" in my passport and pass it back to him, he would overlook that I had not turned in the customs slip. In the moment I was grateful for the informality of the Mexican government, because I didn't have the slip and I knew to get it would be a pain, so I was happy to slide a $20 bill in the passport, and get the paperwork from him that I needed. He then was super friendly chatting with me about the Jazz, and other small trivia he knew about Utah, and I was on my way.
The second was the fake walmart that I found in Matamoros. Note that since I have been here in small, OH SO VERY SMALL, Martinez de la Torre, I have longed for stores like Walmart. A place where you can buy absolutely anything for CHEAP. There are no discount stores here. I was doubly excited because along with there being no discount stores here there are NO, not even one place, to buy books. It still baffles me that I live in a city where no one reads. I have been dying to read the last Harry Potter book, and imagine my delight when I found it there. My glee was immediately dashed when I saw the price. 500 pesos, that is $50 US dollars. Get real, like I can afford that. For an instant I thought of stealing it. Don't worry I came to my senses and I left empty handed. Broken Hearted I walked to the car, so sad that even though I found what looked like a walmart and smelled like a walmart, I was still in mexico so far away from home.
The third was on our way out of matamoros. We were moving at a snail speed in a line of traffic, and suddenly we were being pulled over. Justino was driving and he does not have a license. His Utah license expired in may, and because driving here with no license is rarely an issue he has not gotten a new one. ( by the way, I have been on his case about doing it, and he hasn't, He needs to have it) So we asked the officer why he was pulling us over, and he won't tell us. Clearly not speeding or breaking the law AT ALL, he just got lucky that Justino's license was expired. Justino told him to give him the ticket. Well he doesn't want to give him a ticket. Here if you get a ticket you are escorted to the office to pay immediately and the fine is 150 pesos. He said that the office to pay the ticket was an hour away, and he didn't want to make the journey, and knew we didn't. So, he asks Justino to step out of the car, and then he tell him that it wouldn't be polite to ask in front of his wife, but if he will give him 100 pesos, then he will let us go. Justino paid him, and then I had to drive. I was irate!!!! Clearly he pulled us over because he needed some money for lunch. Because it was cheaper and more convenient we played along, but the cylce continues. The Mexican people, in this case MY HUSBAND, don't value or regard the law because they know that it will never be enforced due to the corruption in the police force. Thus, crime is high, and an overall attitude of informality is bred into society. The cops aren't the only ones, the politicians are worse.
These are the things that are screwing the hard working Mexican people. These are the things that make earning a living here so difficult. This is the mentality that makes it ok for the government here to steal the tax dollars instead of paving the roads and providing clean water. This is the machine the drives the economy here in the toilet. I look around and see more natural resources than I can imagine. Fruit and oil in such abundance. I am stunned that this country isn't so rich. But this corruption keeps it's citizens in bondage. This is why my friend silvia doesn't have running water and has to leave her small children to bring water, even though she live a half a block down the street from me. The government can't afford to run the pipe all the way down the street if the dirty politicians are stealing half of the funds. This is why my friend Franky who has a masters degree to teach has crossed the border three times, to earn money to buy his plaza. Here it is not enough to be educated, you have to come up with 50,000 DOLLARS, not pesos, to buy your classroom and then the government will let you teach. Frankie makes 220 pesos a day painting houses. That is 22 USD, and he could make that in an hour in the states. No wonder they are all crossing the border. I ranted at Justino, because I am not used to this. In my country the road gets paved before the houses are even built. In my country you only have no water if you live on the top of a mountain in a tent, and the only reason you can't drink tap water is if you are SO sophisticated that you have to buy your water, or for the mere convenience, not because you will be sick if you do. In my country you can have ANYTHING if you are willing to work for it. The Mexican people I know, work harder than any American I have ever met, and so many of them have SO SO little.
All my life I heard that I lived in a free country, and I never really knew what that meant. When I left my country I was angry at the imperfect system there that denied my husbands visa. I was disgusted at the small amount of money that our servicemen make, and so many other things that aren't right about our system. I distrusted the government. I know that the US government is not perfect. My life is evidence of that. But I am grateful for the good things they do. I am grateful for the clean water, and paved roads and the constant electricity and all the things that I thought we just part of everyone's life. Now that I live here I know that they are not, and they are such luxuries that i took so for granted. There is much about Mexico that I love and I want my children to know the good of this country and especially the good of this people. But I am an American. My whole family is there, Justino's whole family is there. Please Dear God send us back to the land of the free.